Renewing Dignity in Our Times
Hey! How about this world right now? Right?
It’s hard for me to sit down and know what to say. I tend to be overly considerate. Thinking about how my words may resonate with you as a reader. Backspace is a close friend of mine a lot of times. We live in a fragile culture now as much as ever. But I think of some words Christ spoke frequently: “Let those who have ears hear.” Except, in our day and age I will say let those who have attention spans focus… At least until the next paragraph.
I hope that doesn’t strike your pride. Or maybe I do.
Pride is a good topic to expose. I’ve been dwelling on this recently. Not your pride, but my own. Remembering times when I thought I knew who I was and what I stood for. Now I don’t even know anymore, and that doesn’t have me thinking ‘when did I lose pride’, but when did I lose my dignity?
Dignity is the right of a person to be valued and respected for their own sake and to be treated ethically. If we’re going to bring what is right and fair to the world I believe it’s when we all begin to restore our dignity. As Mahatma Gandhi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”
When I feel lost I begin to wander into my mind when it was last good. Searching for a time in my life when things were going well. This is tricky. Before GPS we had to rely on maps to show us how to get somewhere unknown. If you got lost then you may have had to swallow your pride and do something with dignity. Ask for help. Which involved admitting, at least to yourself, that you are wrong.
If you aren’t humble you may try and “backtrack” your steps without asking for directions. That’s a slippery slope in terms of the mind. You try and mimic the previous experiences of your life into current reality. There is a saying:
You can’t dip your feet into the same river twice.
If you do replicate everything that once was into the here and now, then further destruction comes. What you create will collapse. That’s fair, but many people cry foul.
Photo by Ilya Shishikhin
I once had such a great profound time in my life. A time I thought would last forever. I had been doing everything I was told was best for me up to that point. I was in a good place in my heart. I had friendships. I had the best girlfriend. For the first time in my life, I felt true freedom. But it didn’t last forever.
Life occurred. Friends had to move in different directions. My relationship didn’t work out. I chewed on it for a long time. I thought “Man, I am going get that back. I’m going to figure this out until it works.” And it did. I got my life together by imitation of the past. Once I had shoved all of the pieces into a cohesive replication of what once was... it all fell apart.
That struck my pride. It took away my dignity, or what dignity I was trying to salvage. Rather than letting it go a long time ago (perhaps asking for some help), I put precious time and energy (years of my life) into something that wasn’t going to work. One is a fool in this circumstance. No matter how much people will butter you up, this is a gut check.
What’s all of this getting to anyway? Well, in these moments you reflect deeply. Your conscience weighs in and you begin to see patterns in yourself, as well as in others, that have somewhat encouraged a lower path. And we come to put our pride into this. I hid. Shelled up. Didn’t let anyone into my matters. The greater portion of who I am was suffocated while I built an identity that kept others at a distance.
Like “Hey, come near, but don’t come in.”
No dignity can be grown here. Without dignity, we avoid our responsibilities. We expect things to come to us. And it’s dishonest. We fall into a false sense of pride. One in which we exaggerate our sense of feeling good (or whole), without having a basis of truth in it. It’s like we’ve created a system of living this way, and well, I just don’t want to live it anymore.
Photo by Dave Lowe
What do I want? Sometimes my words are well, but I like what a friend of mine posted on Facebook the other day:
“Don’t forget to experience life as you earn and build. Take time to appreciate the beauty that is all around you every day. Take time to build relationships and to love one another. Be kind, tender-hearted, and compassionate. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable even though you will face hurt. Leave a legacy of love. It is my only hope that when I am gone those who interacted with me can say they felt the warmth of my soul. I pray that my soul warms yours and that yours warms mine in return.”
I think this offers us the dignity we crave. We can be heard, felt, and loved this way. I believe that many are prideful but without dignity. We must let go of our righteousness. Yes, we have rights, yet those are mirrored by our ability to reflect our responsibilities. For me, and I’m not pointing at you (but if this resonates, by all means listen), I think it is fair to see myself as a part of the problem. Somehow this helps me to see solutions and take the vulnerable courage to correct what I may be doing wrong. This doesn’t mean take all of the blame. That’s still irresponsible. Swallow the pride, embrace humility, and approach with dignity.
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(She/Her)
The gal behind Held In The Heart. The Community Journal is a space for those who feel deeply to express freely. We explore all sorts of things here, from the real & raw healing stories & creative writing, to the funny & fleeting moments of everyday human life. I warmly welcome you and invite you to explore with us!